Did you hear about the huge circus fire on Long Island?
It was in tents!
It was so intense, in fact, that it killed 20 clowns.
They were all taken to the hospital in one ambulance.
Alas, however, hours later they succumbed to mortality. They were all buried in the same coffin later that week.
Not a laughing matter, even by their own standards.
The whole story was so appalling, it got my friend, Harry, thinking like never before about his own mortality. As a result, he's finally decided to stop stalling and pursue his dream a reality: selling fake toupees.