A rabbi walks into a bar, and shouts in pain, "That was worst than my second circumcision. … I imagine. I mean, that youngster just kept howling. Nothing like the first."
A man rushes to his office to pick up his paycheck, only to find the doors locked and the building empty. He recalls his boss had said today would be an early day. Late again. So much for painting the town red tonight with Debra.
Dejected, he walks away, passing a convenient store right next to his employer's office. Whether from disappointment or from having just run a few blocks, he feels a tickle in his throat and steps in for a refreshing beverage. As he is walking out he notices an envelope taped to the automatic sliding glass door. His name is written on the envelope. He take a sip, looks around, and then pulls the envelope down. It is unsealed. Inside is his paycheck, already signed and endorsed with his digital signature.
The man is outraged. How could his boss leave his entire salary just hanging up in a convenient store! He puts his drink on the counter and dials his boss's cell phone. Herman, Mr. Boss Man, picks up.
"Excuse me, sir," says the man, trying to contain himself, "but why is my check on the door of this store?"
"Well," answers Herman, matter of factly, "you said you needed it today."
"Yes, but…," he interjects feebly.
"And now you have it. They don't call it a convenient store for nothing!"
"But, sir, with all due respect, it's a little crazy!"
"I know! Just look at their prices!"
[This is intended to be an Ernius and Bertus sketch, but I don't have the time right now to format; I just want to get it out there. And I think you would agree it is very much out there.]