Here's to Socrates!

I read Christopher Phillips's Socrates Café today. I must admit, despite its cool title and very trendy populist texture, the book's prose was often rambling and painfully pedantic. I found my eyes drooping at least a few times, especially since most of the book consists of page after page after erratic page of brief and ultimately vague descriptions of innumerable people trying to say lots and lots of profound things. The plausibility, or authenticity, of the "conversations" was dubious at best. I got a good feel for how undergrad intro philosophy professors must feel. How many times can you see people get worked up so ignorantly about rabbit holes you know were tracked and closed millennia ago? ("Yeah, but how do we even know we're here, man! .. And, besides, what is 'here' anyway!"). The book quickly went from bordering on fatuity to basically wallowing in it. It reminded me of that surrealistic philosophy anime movie, Waking Life, which I found banal precisely because it tried to be oh so profound. (Of course, the story and, above all, the animation were tops.) As I read, I was thankful, truly thankful, for every single narrative interlude (about Phillips journey and some of his touching Socratic encounters), so I could get a breath from the heavy breathing in the chat sessions. It was like reading an undergrad's philosophy journal: intentionally, even cathartically, formless and aimless and groping. At least Phillips didn't indulge in any undue anti-religious boot stomping.

I hate to come across so negatively about the book, since I really appreciate what it's trying to say. Despite the unpleasant presentation was inspiring, and in several ways, informative. Bring philosophy -- understood as a hearty Socratic love for honesty, humility, learning and cooperative excellence in the pursuit of truth -- back to the people, shouts Phillips, founder of the Society for Philosophical Inquiry.

The fabled "Socratic method" gets a lot of press as being very subtle and nuanced, and, for many a non-philosopher, it holds a kind of mythical mysterious allure. But let me make things easy for you and tell you the discovery I and my dormmate made my freshmen year of college. After weeks -- whole weeks, I tell you! -- of discussing and pondering this "elenctic method", this means to "aporia", in and out of class, we discovered the true Socratic method. When your "interlocutor" makes a claim, just select a word or short phrase, at random really, and repeat it in a rising, deliberate, interrogative, quizzical tone.

For example, if you say, "Today is a nice day," I just reply, "Today?" Or maybe I'll say, "Nice?" And so forth. Regardless what word I repeat, you'll be thrown back on your heels, suddenly unsure how to proceed. Chit chat has just become possible grist for the gadfly's mill. (Ah, Socratic bliss!) "Yes," you continue, a little hesitantly, perhaps frowning ever so faintly at me as I stare you down with a waiting grin, "yes, the weather is nice today." "Is?" I reply coyly. "What's your problem, man? It's just a nice day," you snap. "Problem?" And so forth. Great fun and true ancient Greek wisdom. (Once we made this breakthrough, though, my dormmate and I had no more wonder about why Athens offed Socrates.)

Anyway, over lunch today I had a flash of genius to combine populist philosophy with popular consumerism: Hemlock Beer. Or, just "Hemlock". Good possible slogans:

"Hemlock. To beer or not to beer?"

"Thinking of drinking? Drinking for thinking. Hemlock."

"Hemlock. It puts the head back in beer."

"Ours wouldn't have killed Socrates."

(Reader submissions?)



Hemlock is basically just beer -- but with profiles and quotes from famous philosophers on the side of the can. To ensure the beer weren't too highbrow, these can-side profiles would have whimsical and wry, sort of like The Onion covering Plato. Think about it: What better way to spend a night out (or in) than haggling and yelling with drunk people about the deep questions of life! ("I drink therefore I am?" "Why beer and not nothing?" "Does beer have a soul? Do I have a soul? If so, is it made of beer?" "Does Miller Lite really taste great ... or is it really just less filling?" "Got milk?" Etc.) I imagine it would be immensely popular in college dorms as well as posh seashore condos.

In the excitement of creativity, I thought of a product extension: Philosopher Brews. Find out what brews various philosophers enjoyed best and run a series of special brews in their honor.

You could even have drinker essay contests. "What did you learn while drinking Hemlock?"

I unabashedly admit this beer rests on almost pure gimmick, but I would insist it were finely brewed, affordable beer. Of course, I realize it might be little naughty of me to fuse education with heavy drinking... but well, I can only hope things go down smoothly.

FCA Patron Saint Day

Today is the feast day of Sts. Cyril and Methodius, co-patrons of Europe and great witnesses of faternal unity in the faith, faithful union between East and West in the Church, and great Christian zeal. (And, hey, they were Greek!)



Ut unum sint, ora proa nobis!

Wheeze, wheeze, wheeze

I hate sounding like such a wheezer, but these days I just >wheeze< cannot >wheeze< generate >wheeze< any blogging steam. Not that that's a very bad thing. I still have the final series-essays "on [perpetual] deck", but lately, being all over Taiwan during the break, trying to "keep in step with the Spirit" after my retreat all last week (which was almost certainly the most totally, holistically edifying retreat of my life), catching up on so many bagging loose ends as soon as I got back in Taichung, prepping for a new semester, etc. The usual slog.

Haha, but I'm doing well. Thanks for your various comments, too. Wish I could say more, really, but, that's all I've got. For now, life offline won't stop screaming my name. All in due time...

PS. Some of you who chimed in about my taste in tea and martial arts may be pleasantly surprised by some changes on the horizon for this wee sinful blogger.

And...I'm out

Last day of teaching today, for about two weeks. I've been "dealing" with things (fiscal, academic, spiritual, etc.) the last few days. Sorry to leave you hanging (except for a couple posts at ScIn). Such is blogdom, eh?

I'm headed off eeaarrrly tomorrow to Li Shan for a few days' getaway. Then it's back in Taichung for a few days not-away, during which I do hope to post more in the never-ending series of series. And then, I'm off to Jing Shan, a Jesuit retreat center, for a more intense, more directed retreat.

During all this time, though I will have the occasional access to the Net, I am for the most part offline in every sense of the word. Feel free to contact me, but don't expect a prompt reply.

I hope you're well and God bless you!

New posts up at ScIn

Broad zoom?, Tea pot?, Waking bears? and Thought experiments?

Falling in love again?

It dawned on me recently certain pleasures and joys of my life, which I had either forgotten or neglected and then embarrassedly tried to forget, have come back to life within me. To name a few: my desire to visit Montana and Wyoming, my esteem for Fr. Jaki's witness, my old love for rowing and erging, my taste for Scorsese and (pre-Rocky-&-Bullwinkle-and-Analyze-This) De Niro films, and now, my interest in judo. That's right, though I kept it secret for a while here in Taiwan, and have actually never addressed here at FCA, it's true: I like judo and I did it for a few months before World Youth Day. (The shrewd and those among with too much free time should have gathered as much from some early entries on my Amazon Wish List.)

I intended to return to judo (róu dào 柔道) quickly upon my return from Europe (September or so), but between post-WYD fatigue, new-semester fatigue, fall-illness fatigue, heavy-writing-commitments fatigue, a general disaffection for my dojo (which I find too small, too laissez-faire in its instruction and too populated by teens and small children), and, finally - why lie? – an occasional albeit genuine repulsion towards paying to fight a grown man and get tackled or thrown by him[1] - for all these reasons, I've put it off till now. (Oh, and let's not forget the shame of going back so late despite having expressed my intention to return promptly after summer. Sigh. What little "face" I as a foreigner have in this culture I do not too blithely risk.) But no longer. My desire to return to the mat is envigoratingly palpable and grows every day.

Alas, knowing my luck, just about the time I get back into the swing of judo, the school will shut down for Chinese New Year. Maybe just in time for me to hop back on that erg...?!

[1] Believe it or not, I've done my small share of reading about martial arts and "real" self-defense training and, after a little reflection, was not really that surprised to hear judo described by a leading combat trainer as the best all-around training for a real fight, or real self-defense, bar none. (This fact grates like nails on chalk in the ears of my friend who is a serious tae kwon do student. But, hey, facts is facts.) Aside from judo's natural ability to train your body holistically, according to the relentless, unpredictable and fluid demands of live close-quarters competition, and even aside from the vital technical skills judo brings to bear in a dangerous encounter, the most basic advantage of judo for "combat readiness" is the fact that at every single practice you get real live psychological training to face and handle an aggressive human being.

Now, lest you get the wrong idea about me - "The Cogitator, a violent psychopath?!" - I like judo because it is pure and visceral. For one thing, judo is a serious workout. It requires stamina, flexibility, agility and strength sufficient to withstand sudden attacks and/or to complete sometimes stunning throws. I also like judo because there are no overly technical chops, kicks and hops (these things are what you learn either in advanced judo or jujitsu, from which Jigoro Kano derived judo). There are no nifty gadgets, pads, weapons or special shoes. In judo, there is just energy, balance, timing, strength and - above all - the wisdom of "strategic relenting." Effective "relenting" in judo is tied directly to its name (柔道), which translates from Japanese (here, via Chinese) as "the supple or soft [ró] way [dào]."

Contrary to some popular conceptions, including my own several months ago, it is not judo's lack of "hard" blows, like those in gong fu or tae kwon do, that make it soft; in fact, when people encounter judo for the first, they are struck by just how not soft it seems! Indeed, the "soft" (ró 柔) nature of its name is prima facie misleading. Far from being gentle and fluid in the manner of a ballet, judo is "soft and supple" in the characteristically Japanese sense of taking more aggression than you give until you absolutely must return it and overpower your opponent. Judo is soft because it requires you to move with an internal softness, almost passivity, according to your opponent's energy. Rather than forcing and jerking your way into a "hard" artificial move, judo requires you to remain soft (at least within your spirit, since true physical passivity would get you tossed about like a sack doll) until the key moment: then even a soft or supple action suffices to overcome your opponent. The "passive" suppleness of judo to which I just alluded refers to the essential technique of exploiting what your opponent gives you; in this way, you become the softer, more relenting, athlete. Exploiting your opponent's actions does not merely mean receding back as he pushes you, so that you may "sick" him into a backwards throw; it also means giving him your weight in unexpectedly, and thus victoriously, greater abundance if he pulls you. A final aspect of judo's softness has everything to do with its most fundamental skill: falling (ukemi). If you can't fall correctly, you can't do judo. Period. This is why the first phase of any judo training consists of drilling the proper falling technique. (See what I mean about "falling" in love again with judo?)

It didn't dawn on me till this moment, but I am happy to say a final good of judo for me is the "cultural catharsis" it can and should be. Any regular readers here will know - why lie? - I have an unfortunate but undeniable bias against Japan. How apposite and redemptive it is, then, for me to love a quintessentially Japanese sport! Ad majorem Dei gloriam!

Here are some good articles on the things I've discussed in this note:

Fundamental Principles of Judo by Kenji Tomiki

The Study of Falling by Neil Ohlenkamp

Judo: The Gentle Tao by Alan Watts

And a whole gaggle of others!