Monday, September 6, 2004

Cameo Blogging Alert!

My old roomie, Erick, of Like You Care demi-fame, has made it home and apparently has not lost his critical eye at the international date line.

8/28/04: I'm back from my travels, home again in Salem Oregon. ... My world travels have revealed this to me: Starbucks cup sizes don't make any damn sense.

Tall: Tall is a measure of vertical height, not size. Thus we are left wondering how much liquid is in this "tall" cup.

Grande: "Grande" means "big" from Italian. Vaguely descriptive at best.

Venti: This translates as "twenty". This is a reference to the ounces the cup will contain.

Not to mention that the cup sizes don't have anything to do with one another. Tall, a measure of one dimension. Grande, something big. And Venti, the number twenty. Why not just friggin small, medium, large?

Amen, dude. The confusion must have to do with Starbucks's globally recognized plan to stir humankind into a sweet caffeinated frenzy, conquer the world and incubate the a future super race of coffee grinders in vats of an amniotic-like fluid blend of iced coffee, mocha and steamed milk (and Tabasco -- don't ask). They shall shake their enemies with ambiguity. "Friggin" never sounded so righteous.

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